Self Pleasure | First we must learn to feel

There is only a fine line between pleasure and pain. For those of use with trauma and sensitive nervous systems it doesn't take much to trigger a full body stress response which can take an intimate moment from hot to not in a flash. Whether its racing thoughts, swirling fear & anxiety, known sensory triggers or unconscious defence responses our body has a way of letting us know it’s not feeling safe.  

These responses are by no means wrong, or bad, but they can be confusing, annoying and infuriating. These big, often overwhelming responses can leave us disconnected and disassociated, which can keep us isolated and often timid, reluctant or even blissfully oblivious to explore our bodies or open up for fear of what or how our body will do.

I've lived most of my life feeling not in control of my own body and keeping people at a distant and it’s served me for a time. I am grateful to be on a path of self-development and self-knowing in my pursuit of happiness and I am grateful and appreciate my younger self, in all their imperfections.

This collection is being curated as an ode to learning to reconnect with your body. In honour of the slow, often excruciating and humbling process of learning about ourselves and how our bodies work. To learning what feels good, what we like, what we don’t, what we crave and what we hope for. Answers often buried deep beneath trauma and deep seeded shame.

Sadly, trauma doesn't just go away with time, but in time, we can learn to understand and even appreciate how our bodies have learned to adapt and keep us safe and the myriad of ways in which that looks, feels and presents itself. Our bodies are incredible, far become what we can often intellectualise. Continuing to learn how my body works has helped me continue to grow and develop and access pieces of myself that I’ve so deeply longed for. 

Starting slow and going gently and with patience for yourself is what this collection is inviting. In my experience going slow is often that takes practice  and a level of permission, either by self or from someone else, to begin to unravel and try something new. Like most things, the first time we try something is can be hard, and with practice and persistence it can get easier and more rewarding, but first we must learn to feel our full spectrum of feels and acknowledge our own needs 🖤

This is an invitation for self inquiry and practice which can be partnered with professional support and will be followed by community support in the coming months.